Kids often use humor to connect—but when a joke crosses the line, “just kidding” isn’t always enough. This week’s Social Coaching Scoop offers practical ways to coach kids through the boundaries of humor and the impact of teasing. Also in this issue: ✅ Summer enrollment updates ✅ A resource spotlight for teens ✅ Academic tutoring availability 📬 Take a look at what we’re working on: https://conta.cc/408h6Au #SocialEmotionalLearning #BehaviorSupport #ChildDevelopment #ParentEducation #SchoolSupport #ProfessionalDevelopment #SocialCoaching

Joining group play can feel tricky for lots of kids — but it’s a skill they can absolutely learn. This week’s Social Coaching Scoop shares simple, confidence-building ways to help kids join in successfully — plus two brand-new digital resources to support this skill! Read this week’s Scoop: https://conta.cc/3Zn1Tvm If your child has ever said “I wanted to play, but didn’t know how…” this week’s issue is for you. #SocialSkillsForKids #FriendshipSkills #SocialCoaching #ParentingSupport #SummerPrograms #PeterPanCenter #ConfidenceBuilding #SEL #JoiningIn #SocialEmotionalLearning

“I Don’t Care!” Ever heard that one? Chances are, your child does care—but just doesn’t know how to show it. This week’s Social Coaching Scoop is all about helping kids express their feelings without shutting down. You’ll also find: Details on our K–5 Summer Social Program A must-read book for common friendship challenges A full list of our upcoming workshops Tips for parents navigating tricky behaviors this summer Check it out here: https://conta.cc/3FFhqjl #ParentingHelp #SocialSkillsForKids #PeterPanCenter #SummerSocialGroup #FriendshipSkills #BoxboroughMA #EmotionalGrowth

🧠 “That’s Not Fair!” – This Week’s Social Coaching Scoop In this week’s newsletter, we’re tackling one of the most common kid complaints: “That’s not fair!” Learn how to turn these tough moments into teachable ones that build emotional resilience and social flexibility. Plus: ✅ Summer social skills groups in Boxborough, MA 📚 Friendship-building book series 🧾 Parent consults & school support 💻 Fall workshop bookings now open 📬 Read it here: https://conta.cc/3Z2RjcD Serving families across Boxborough, Acton, and surrounding communities. #SocialSkills #EmotionalRegulation #DonnaShea #PeterPanCenter #ParentSupport #BoxboroughMA #SummerPrograms #CoachingKids #SocialEmotionalLearning #MiddlesexCountyMA

Have you ever heard a child say something brutally honest—like, “That’s a weird shirt” or “This is boring”—and wanted to disappear into the floor?

They weren’t being mean on purpose. They were simply missing a key social skill: using a filter.

In my social groups, we talk a lot about social filters—the tool kids need to pause and ask themselves: “Should I say this out loud… or just keep it in my head?”

🎯 Why It Matters:

Social filters help protect friendships. They give kids the power to think before they speak, consider the feelings of others, and avoid misunderstandings that can push peers away.

🧠 How to Teach It:

• Try the “Think It or Say It?” game. Give examples and ask your child to decide whether it’s something to say out loud or keep private.
• Talk about tone and timing. Even helpful feedback (“You have something on your face”) needs the right delivery.
• Model it! Share your own moments of “thinking it” but not saying it: “I was annoyed at the store today, but I kept that thought to myself.”

💬 What to Say to Your Child:

• “Just because a thought pops into your brain doesn’t mean it needs to pop out of your mouth.”
• “It’s okay to think something—but if it might hurt someone’s feelings, it’s probably better to keep it private.”

🌱 The Long-Term Payoff:

Kids who learn how to use social filters grow into adults who are more emotionally intelligent, self-aware, and capable of forming lasting relationships. And that starts with a little coaching, a little practice, and a whole lot of patience.

From Sidelines to Starters: Coaching Kids to Make the First Social Move

If your child struggles with making the first move in social situations, they’re not alone. Many kids wait to be noticed, invited, or included—but learning how to initiate friendship is a powerful skill that can open the door to real social success.

At our social coaching program for children in Boxborough, MA, we use relatable metaphors—like football—to teach social skills for kids in a way that feels fun and familiar. We explain that in friendship, just like in football, there are receivers and quarterbacks. The receiver waits, while the quarterback makes the play. And in the game of making friends, the child who knows how to throw the friendship ball—even something as simple as saying, “Wanna play?”—has a better shot at connection.

Whether your child is shy, unsure, or just needs a little coaching to build confidence, our approach is grounded in social coaching strategies that support positive social development in real-world settings.

Crafting Friendship IRL!

This week’s social skills activity is inspired by one of our favorite games—Minecraft!

We challenged our kiddos to build a crafting table and tools using nothing but sticks, cardboard, and duct tape. Why? Because just like in Minecraft, real-life friendships take creativity, collaboration, and problem-solving to build.

What they practiced:

Teamwork

Compromise

Turn-taking

Sharing ideas (and duct tape!) Watching them plan, build, laugh, and troubleshoot together reminded us that sometimes the best way to build friendship… is to literally build it.

#SocialSkillsInPlay #MinecraftIRL #CraftingFriendship #SocialLearning #KidsWhoBuild

Social rejection is tough—for kids and their grownups. Whether it’s not being invited to a party or being left out of a game, rejection hurts. But it can also be a powerful moment for growth. Here are a few ways to help your child bounce back and build resilience:

Normalize the feeling: “It’s okay to feel sad or left out. That happens to everyone sometimes.”

Reframe the experience: “This doesn’t mean you’re not a good friend. It just means you’re still learning how to find your people—and that takes time.”

Coach, don’t rescue: Role-play what your child might say or do next time. This builds social confidence and problem-solving skills.

Celebrate courage: Showing up again after being hurt takes bravery. Remind your child how proud you are of their effort to keep trying.

Social success isn’t about always getting it right—it’s about learning, adapting, and growing stronger over time. #SocialSkillsForKids #ParentingTips #ResilientKids #GrowthMindset #SocialEmotionalLearning #KidsLifeSkills

Yesterday, while a group of middle school boys were enjoying the screen time part of their session, I kept hearing the phrase “TikTok brain rot” come up in their conversation.

Curious about what they meant, I did a little digging and came across this article that breaks it down.

Worth a read if you’re wondering what our kids are talking about these days! https://psyche.co/ideas/why-teenagers-are-deliberately-seeking-brain-rot-on-tiktok

I had the pleasure of doing back-to-back trainings on Monday for extended day program providers in Westwood and Natick. I do many of these trainings for before and after school program staff.

A theme that runs through these trainings and discussions is entitlement and lack of respectful interactions from both children and parents.

One example of this: As a special treat, staff took out a Wii to play old school video games. The kids were given a choice to go to the gym or play on the Wii. Those that stayed to play on the Wii were put in a timed rotation system so that everyone had turns and a fair chance to play. A particular child opted to go the gym instead. When his mother picked him up, he spotted the video games and demanded a turn. Staff told him and his mother that there was a system in place and that he had chosen not to participate. His mother demanded he receive a turn as he grew upset, and was told that disrupting the system was not going to happen. As staff left to dismiss other children, they came back to discover that the mother had taken it upon herself to tell the other children they had to stop playing, and her son was using the game.

Another example: A child was given the choice of doing an art project or going outside to the playground. She chose to go outside. At pick-up time, she decided she now wanted to do the project and was told the day was over. As she threw a tantrum, her mother requested that staff put the materials together for her to take home.

Other ways that entitlement is encouraged:

• Asking that exceptions be made for a child;
• Doing everything for a child that the child is capable of doing;
• Undermining adults who care for the child in front of the child;
• Not enforcing the use of basic manners and asking politely instead of making demands; and,
• Any way that we give children the power of one of the needs of many.

Yes, there are kids with specific needs that may need extra support in learning that these basic manners and rules apply to everyone. Challenges such as ADHD are definitely a reason that some things are harder to learn and accomplish, but never an excuse for treating other people poorly.